Whoever said you are always your worst critic, had the right of it. You may have noticed that I have deleted a blog entitled RANT. I read it again today and was a bit shocked that such a negative amount of energy could come out of my mouth.

I could give excuses; however, I am not going to bother. I said it, I felt it so I will own it. I will own it. Those emotions, any emotion, does not own me.

Of course, it hasn't hurt my esteem that CIRCLE Magazine has published my work completely unsolicited. That's right, unsolicited. I didn't go looking for them, they came looking for me! To top things off, I have been invited to present three workshops at ConVocation 2008 in Troy, Michigan (February 2008).
However, the best thing I have done for myself is return to my roots. I have begun to research again and have made it my life work to prove the theories I have suggested. I have decided to risk criticism and scrutiny. What I have to say is important or the Goddess wouldn't have inspired me with it. It does speak to others or there would be no Board of Directors for Family Wiccan Traditions International. I may continue to uncomfortable with the position of teacher and leader; however, I was made for it, called to it. Surrounded again by the familiar sticky notes marking pages of books, I feel like I am back in my element, grounded in research and inspired by those who have gone before me.

Recently, I saw a piece on the news about a man who had been diagnosed with brain cancer. He put together a workshop about his life and all that he had learned, a legacy to leave his three small children. One of the things he said was, "Failure occurs to make sure you want something badly enough."

I have had to answer the question for myself these past few months. I want this badly; however, not for the reasons I would have originally guessed. I want this because I cannot get away from destiny. Her grip upon me is unrelenting and the more I struggle against it the worse off I am.

Nice try naysayers. I have realized something. It isn't about you. It isn't about your opinion. It isn't about YOUR vision. It has nothing to do with you, whatsoever.

It isn't even about me. It is about the continued search for truths hidden, demolished or never uncovered. I am an obedient servant to the journey. A journey that I have just begun. A journey a thousand little sticky notes are mapping out for me through the inspiration of the Muse.